Julie

This story is an illustrative story, meaning it uses a fictionalised example to demonstrate themes, patterns, or experiences commonly found in real-life situations.

Julie was recently diagnosed with early-stage dementia. She lived alone in a semi-rural part of the Isle of Wight. She was largely independent, living in her family home she had shared with her husband before he died. Her three adult children were increasingly concerned about some changes, for example, forgotten meals, confusion during phone calls, and missed medications. Two lived on the island, and one on the mainland.

Each adult child tried to help, but they were not coordinated in their efforts and had varying views on how best to assist and plan for their mother’s future. Mrs J was increasingly frustrated at her children’s attempt to get involved and “take control”. As part of her dementia pathway, it was identified and suggested that a Family Group Conference may be helpful.

With the support of our independent Coordinator, Julie was able to share her wishes, which included staying in her own home, keeping her routines, and being as independent as possible, for as long as possible. The Family Group Conference provided the space for her views to be heard and understood, and for her children to voice their own concerns openly. Julie also invited her neighbour, a friend from the local community centre, and her four grandchildren.

Together, they were able to agree a plan that reflected everyone’s wishes and concerns. This included a coordinated rota for visits and activities, clear division of caring responsibilities for her children, and signposting to some additional services to help maintain independence. They also agreed how and when to review the plan, and what might need to happen as and when Julie was no longer able to be independent at home.

The Plan was shared with everyone and displayed on Julie’s fridge to ensure everyone was on the same page. Everyone felt more settled, and able to help where and when it mattered most. Importantly, Julie felt in control of her own decisions and care – now and for in the future.